Sunday, February 21, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
Thursday, February 18, 2010
cause the debt that was mineyeah you paid every dimewhere once guilt creptnow peace in me dwellswhere once guilt creptnow peace in me dwells
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
You will NOT REGRET watching this video. Seriously, it'll make your day.
My favorite line?
"I'm her mom" "No she's not!"
Question of the day: How do you feel about the Olympics? I will go on record as HATING THEM. I know this makes me unAmerican or something but I'm just not a fan. Do you watch the Olympics? What's your favorite sport? Do you judge me for hating the Olympics?
Have a great day!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required, and from him to whom they entrusted much, they will demand the more.
Hm. So my thoughts went:
God cares for and loves every single human life in the same beautiful way. There are those with simple faith, who will never see the inside of a Sunday school room or own their own Bible or aspire to copy Billy Graham evangelism or follow in the courage of Elizabeth Eliot. These chosen children are precious in their simple faith and God will bless their hearts full with obedience and love. They receive the gift of highest price and perfect quality: the presence of the Almighty God for eternity.
And then there are those children that have on this earth a greater capacity and wider sphere of influence (not that they are greater) from the very beginning when they chose to believe. From these, MUCH IS REQUIRED.
I look at it like this: I have a stove and many don't. Therefore, I should use that stove as a sphere of influence. I have a roof and a bed and clothes and I have a degree and a job and I have two feet and I have two eyes and I have speech and hearing.
Maybe Billy Graham was one of those much-much required types, but I know that my station in life and my background have definitely placed me in the category of much required. So, I'm trying to ask, what areas can I be more obedient? Where can I be more ready and willing to serve my Master, though I sometimes can't see or hear Him clearly?
So, I guess I'll be thinking about this for awhile:)
In the meantime, I happened upon this book and it is now currently on my wishlist. It's all about learning to be a follower instead of a leader. Weird that it sounds so... wimpy.
Monday, February 15, 2010
- how to exterminate little, bitty ants that are taking over our house
- how to prepare food for a 6 o'clock meeting I planned for parents this Wednesday (refreshments or dinner? less work preferably)
- how to market the student retreat (signup deadline on Wednesday) without looking desperate
- how to love on my neighbors without being suspicious of ulterior motives (I'm talking about one very old man neighbor in particular who has said/done a few questionables) **more on this in a later post titled "my dad would be proud"
- how to be as thoughtful as I wish I was
- how to prioritize the randomness that is my day in a very logical non-random way
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Have I mentioned, dear readers, that I am FINALLY TRAVELING BACK TO NY this Spring Break? After 3 years away? I could NOT be more excited to travel back to the mother ship, my home away from home, my happy place. Thinking about traveling back in time to 2006 and the role NYC had in my life, I've taken a look back at my blog posts from that year. In honor of that-here's a thought from Christina of 2006. So different, yet so similar. Check out this post, from August of 2006.
Just got back from the library. Being in the library, looking at the stacks and stacks of books, reminds me more and more that I'm not who I want to be, or not who I percieve myself to be. See, I'm wandering through the stacks of books, attracted to the simple girly titles, all the while feeling guilty that I'm not looking for F. Scott Fitzgerald and Sylvia Plath. Isn't it weird how you have this idea of who you are, even though it's crazy different than the truth? I wouldn't know what to do with Sylvia Plath even if I bought the cliff notes.
I'm learning more now than ever that I know myself less and less. I mean, I KNEW who I was in college, I knew that I was the one to call if you didn't want to study, the one to throw the dinner party, the one to call if you needed some free counseling and "wisdom" from someone who's been through it. While I was IN college, I loved the social life much more than the classes. Now, being out of school, I wish I could go back and have 24 more hours in every day and suck all the learning out of Iowa State. Now that I have every night free, I long for the textbooks I sold back, wishing I had my advertising books so I could read up at night and feel a little more confidant when applying for jobs the upcoming morning. I don't know, it's just so weird to not have "student" "advertising major" "Iowa State University" and "Campus Crusade for Christ socialite" to define me. What defines me now, that I'm not an advertising student at Iowa state spending too much time socializing up the school? What kind of music do I like, now that I can't depend on having a Christian radio station to put on whenever I need some tunes? What kind of books do I like when I don't have a discipler or the local Christian culture telling me what the next big author is? Tough.
Man, my life is strange right now. I never in a million years would have expected for this to be my life right now. I feel like this year is such a long waiting moment in my life. Waiting for adulthood, waiting to find out who I really am without Campus crusade telling me, waiting for New York to feel like home, waiting for a "real" job. It's strange, this life of mine. I am so used to "glass-half-full" life theology that it's hard for me to really look at my life and ADMIT that it's tough. But the thing is, I'm doing alright. Little by little I am finding out who I am. Making the decision to be faithful even when I don't understand. Praying that my self-righteous pride will shut itself up while I just try to do the best that I can. And try to push the mother guilt away while I attempt to raise these children the way their parents want me to and push away my questions about whether they'll turn out really weird after watching this much T.V. What a year. :) But the thing is, I'm smiling my little face off right now, listening to John Legend on the computer (a singer I found all by myself and LOVE LOVE LOVE him) and thinking that I wouldn't trade my life for the world. because I know this is where I'm supposed to be. I know that learning all this is going to make me who I am, future tense :). I'm making no sense, right? Well, somehow in this moment, I'm happy, standing in this gap. I suppose these next couple years after college, I'll be climbing that mountain on the other side. And I'll come out on top,
you'll see :)
So thankful for God being faithful to introduce me more to myself in these last 3 years. To mold me and shape me and make me more and more okay with who I am. And SO fun to look back and see where I was, how far I've come! And to realize that, even though I certainly know myself better now than I did 3 years ago, the "mountain" will take a lifetime to climb. And I'm ok with that!
Question- dear readers. What grew you up? When did you really get to know who you were?
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
Be love now, folks.
The Persecuted Church in Burma
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Monday, February 08, 2010
Then (as if revelations such as these come so quickly and gently) she said, "Well, I bet that's how God feels when He looks down at us... only magnified."
.........whoooosh. This is the perspective I needed!
Today, please let me hook you up with a few things that are inspiring and interesting and accessible through this little monster called the internet.
Free music by Shaun Groves. I really support the way that this man is going about his ministry through music. Check him out - he'll give you three songs for free here.
You probably know I just finished Forgotten God by Francis Chan. Well, I didn't use any of his internet resources for this book (even though I really liked using them when our Bible study read through Crazy Love). But, now I find out that there are some great resources there! Also, I happened upon this "trailer" on vimeo and I think it's worth checking out. It just might convince you that you should pick up the book too.
Forgotten God Trailer from Jacob Lewis on Vimeo.
Let's just say you are like my dad and in the car a lot. And let's also say you wouldn't mind having something intelligent to listen to (other than, let's say, radio talk and country music), then you should definitely check this out: Christian audio allows you to download one FREE book each MONTH! That's right - it's free! I'm all about getting things for freesies and this month I think it's a gem, so I'm sharing it with you. It's a book by Mark Driscoll called, "Religion Saves."
Download - christianaudio.com
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Sunday, February 07, 2010
I am preparing for the season of Lent. I don't know what this will mean, but I know I don't want to be about giving something up if I'm not adding more Truth to the daily mix. I want this time to be one where I understand better my history/why it is important, and how I will live differently beyond 40 days.
I just think I want to start some heart-preparing now.
I'm trudging on through the BRP (Bible Reading Plan) from the ESV study Bible and can't begin to count the blessings. Does anyone have any ideas, readings, books of common prayer, etc. that would be a good centering tool for this season (in addition to daily study)?
Oh, and yes, I did watch the Super Bowl at Micah House tonight (amongst many uninterested Micah boys:) and I did see the pretty amazing two point conversion... and I did try to explain the game of fútbol americano to several Hondurans (fail). It was a good night!
Saturday, February 06, 2010
only that my discouragement sent me into my little cave of questions. You know, if you set out to do anything, absolutely anything, and you have your own agenda about how it needs doing... you may (likely) be disappointed in the process. And this is me, disappointed.
So, what did my time in the cave teach me? Trust more that the Lord will complete the work, tarry on with God as means and end, serve and obey out of love for God and not for man, expect to see nothing/get nothing/show nothing for the work.
And what is waiting as I step into these lessons? Joy. Again, joy. The presence of the Lord awaits and (Ps. 16:11) there I will find fullness of joy. God promised his people through Jeremiah that "if you seek me, you will find me, if you seek me with all your heart" (29:12).
That right there is Truth I can hold onto... Truth I can cling to when I need to curl up into my cave in a mess of disappointments. I can hibernate on that and come out refreshed and revived. If I'm not shy about my heart for the Lord, He will not hold back in showing me His presence.
Now, for the doing...
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
Entirely unrelated (and mostly because I already have it written and it's an easy copy/paste job), I wanted to share something from awhile back. I spoke to two different sets of high school students a couple weeks ago on Nehemiah 8 (per my mother's brilliant suggestion) in an attempt to discuss joy and suffering. I did some writing before/after and here some excerpts:
When I stand up against Truth ...
(sin secret and hidden) spouting
nonsense words and misplaced
SHAME fills me and
too weak to stand
destroyed and scattered like
chaff, swept up by the hungry wind
and I fall faster
fear, though I know its true place
surrounds the pieces
of what was once complete
the feeling that i have failed
that the world has failed
is only overcome by the
it is overcome by the
Monday, February 01, 2010
"It's not personal, it's business." - quote from my favorite movie, You've Got Mail. The Tom Hanks character says it to the Meg Ryan character as he's putting her little Shop Around the Corner out of business.
Reminds me of something I've been talking over with a friend of mine lately. Over Thai food this Friday night, the question kept coming up- what's personal, and what's business? As someone who notoriously does not keep my cards held close, a difference between business and personal used to make little to no sense to me. A relationship is a relationship! Screw me over in business, you've screwed me over in life, end of story. But after 1 year nannying someone else's babies in NY, 2 years in a poorly lit cubicle at a Marketing Company (ironically, with the aforementioned Thai food buddy,) and now knocking on the door of the typical 18 month life span of a youth worker, I've seen that this is not the case. Turns out most people feel that business and personal are different.
-For instance, you can trust someone as a friend, but not as a colleague.
-You could admire someone as a family man but not as a businessman.
-You might enjoy someones jokes at a BBQ but not during a board meeting.
-You may respect someone as a professional but not as a person.
The problem is- seems that everyone has a different idea of the blurred lines between the two. It appears that everyone in today's workplace attended a different "Standard Business Practices 101" in College, rendering us in not only different pages, but entirely different books when it comes to these matters. This can be very frustrating! Bears to mention, of course, that looking inward has me even more frustrated in this area. Why am I so confident in 'real life' but lose it when it comes to a big meeting with the Big Dogs at the Big Ole Church where I work? Why do I trust my viewpoints in life, but not at work? Seems I have my own double standards going on.
So here's the question- where are the lines in your life? Do you have the same confidence as a professional as you do in 'real life'? Are you as trustworthy at work as you are as a friend? Are there people in your life that you like as a person, but not as a co-worker?